Dire situation

I have a bad attitude. About everything. About life, work, you name it. I have no idea how I got here, cause it's not like me, but more importantly I don't know how to get out of it. I don't think I'd go so far as to say depressed but i am sad. And I'm scared. And there's nobody to even help or care or talk to.  It's just been gradually getting worse for the last 9 months now. Everybody keeps saying it needs to come from me but guess what? I'm trying and it's not working so that line isn't helping, it just makes things worse in my head.