so this week has had it's ups and downs. i have gotten in trouble a few good times, for no legit reason, my curfews have been short, and it's my last week. club dans was a party on monday. we just chilled and talked. secret life wasn't as good as i was hoping on tuesday. i mean i still loved it but it wasn't as intense as others. but next man...oh boy it is gonna be crazy. i went on a date and it was pretty fun. we did fun stuff, but for some reason i just wasn't feeling it.. and today has been sort of a low day. i've been trying to figure out money for college and i'm just not smart enough for scholarships so it was a stressful day. i went in my room and layed [sp??] in my bed and just cried for about a half hour. i just felt so small and the world is so big. and i felt like there is no one out there to help me get through this all. my parents can't exactly pay for it and there is so much. room and board, food, tuition, all the stuff for my dorm, and books...it's just overwhelming. plus all the money to pay for my actual flying time. ah. it's just...ah. and we're all leaving soon and my time has run out. i leave for an extended family vacation saturday and i am not at all excited. it is taking 10 days out of my summer and my family is always fighting and meh... well i am off to ali's birthday party which will be way fun. i love this girl to the moon. she is like my sister.
but moving off to college i'm gonna have to take a chance, a leap of faith. believe that the Lord can help through this tough time. I'm gonna have to risk alot and i'm sure there will be many rewards. and i think i'm ready to move in. in some aspects.
"it's not always easy being this far apart
but don't you get the feeling we're connected at the heart?
and we're dreaming under the same moon
under the same stars."
1 comment:
hey babay... i love you! and i feel the same way about feeling so small. i have been doing my fair share of crying, i know how you feel. i love that quote at the end. and i love you!
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